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There’s Gonna Be Some Changes Around Here!

February 6, 2013

Tripping the delights of memory lane is one thing but life is a day to day business of coping and dealing with real time events and consequences.

Mr E  Streams is not a happy man and it is all my fault.  He tells me so.  All the time.

I'm not mad, I promise!  I'm just a married woman, can you please save my life and give me the job?
“I’m not mad, I promise!  I’m just a married woman, can you please save my life and give me the job?”
%#*&  it!

I have been a fool of a woman for too long and now I must set about changing course.  Find a new direction.  For too many years I thought it was enough being Ed’s wife, the mother of our three children.  My energy levels weren’t exactly overflowing and for a long time I was in the worst possible spot for a woman in a relationship to be.  I was . . . . tired.  ALL THE TIME.  No fucking, no kidding!

Actually, I tell a bit of a lie here because there was sex in that let’s get it over and done with and out of the way as soon as possible so we/I can sleep for as long as possible way you do, please?  Before the baby/child/teenager wakes up/comes home.

We followed Ed around the world, wherever his job took him, or rather, wherever Ed decided to let the job take him.

Somewhere along the way I forgot to get myself a proper job.  A career!  OMG, a career, I mean who wouldn’t want one of those!  Working my way to the top(ish) of some network or other if only to earn my own money (in-built editor here is telling me “my own money” is a redundant phrase.  Ha, and I am a redundant woman,  perfect fit!) and thus be more of a support to Ed in not only providing for us but also to be more supportive and understanding of the filthy practices at play in the world at work.

Ed flew off to LA yesterday where he has business.  Indeed Ed has had regular business over there for quite a while now.  He is smitten with his Project Manager, a 6′ Brazilian woman who “still looks good for 37!”  Zilian is not married, but what does that have to do with anything?  She really get’s him and they work so well together!

For too long he has had to cope with incompetent idiots, too many who are not up to his highly disciplined intellectual standards. But with Zilian, the flow just happens.  And that for Ed is work magic.

Or it was work magic until Zilian announced out of the blue that she is getting married and is now so loved up and into the planning of the future that a few little work details are slipping by the side.

Ed’s pissed and Ed is angry and I am ducking and diving trying to stay out of the way of getting hurt because I can’t go down.  I go down, I become a victim and I’m not going to let that happen.  Er, not again anytime soon, anyway . . .

Plus, it’s not about me.  It’s about Ed and Ed has a wide spread when it comes to unhappiness and dissatisfaction.

So I have decided to take matters into my own hands.  Today I applied for a job!

I have skills and I am going to use them to the max and can’t wait to hear back.  The thought of earning money, my money, sends me into delirious heights of fantasy.  Not for the shoes and shit I can buy with said own money, but I can take a load off Ed’s poor hard worked shoulders (what took me so long I hear you ask?) and never have to take another penny from him!

Why, I might even be able to pay my own rent if/when I finally move out and strike it on my own in the event that Zilian is calling Ed’s bluff by getting married, so out of the blue . . . .

Who me, paranoid?

Never let facts get in the way of a good drama!

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